What I want my resume to say!

I don't have a lot of experience on my resume, and while this may be true in the corporate business sector (like anyone cares about that...) I think it is not telling the full story. I feel under represented because I can't make a resume say the things about me that I want people to know. Here I would like to share what I wish I could put in a resume. (In case this disclaimer is still necessary, I usually do these to be funny, albeit it is true!)

I was born in Germany and came here when I was four. Amid my parents divorce, I was raised by my grandmother and grandfather. My uncle lived with us, along with his boyfriend, a wonderful black man. These experiences helped to shape my world view. Kindergarten wanted to keep me back for mixing two letters of the alphabet in my second language. I then went to Catholic school as a child while my mother went to nursing school. I didn't have many friends, but usually clung to the other kid who was slightly different from everyone else.

In high school I was in a few clubs such as E.R.A.S.E. (anti-racism) and cheer leading. I was a flier and we competed in the first tournament as a team in about 20 years. I was also the odd one out, forsaking what was popular in style for doing my own thing. In the past I have dealt with major traumatic issues related to living in today's complex world such as eating disorders, depression and self mutilation. I have beat them all, without medical intervention. I have learned much from these experiences. I also have learned a lot from horrible boyfriends. Thanks guys! I fluctuated in school from excellent to terrible depending on how bad life was at the time, sometimes I did well even when life was bad. I have modeled in the past for dozens of photographers and been painted by many others. My image has been published in books, been shown at galleries and been on the cover of artists magazine. I don't even count the web images as important enough. I have also been thanked in CD credits. My style is fly and professionals (a teacher from Pratt stopped me in the street!) have told me to go into fashion, but I'm not ruthless enough for a world of shallow illusion. I stopped doing some of these things because I like to be ahead of the game. I quit smoking.

I would like to explain the school thing a little bit more.

(Spring '07) My first semester at Kean I was working two jobs, a total of 50-60 hours a week (If you don't believe me, I can break it down for you: 12 hour shifts at a restaurant 3-4 times a week, usually Wednesday, Friday and Saturday but sometimes Monday as well. Tuesday and Thursday I had class late so I worked at Red Bull in the morning or evening and couldn't make the restaurant. Monday and Wednesday class was earlier so I got out in time to work at the restaurant. I would get out around 12:30-2:30 and still managed to spend time drinking after wards since that's part of the job description of a waitress. If I had to shower I would get to bed at 4am and wake up for RB at 7. I also worked RB in any spare days, such as Sundays for a total of about 20-30 hours. I still managed to have a hectic social life.) School was full time. I earned straight A's. I spent some of the time trying to convert religions.

(Fall '07) The next semester I was married and pregnant. I was Jewish, so I was keeping Shabbat as well as Jewish holidays, and in case you didn't get the memo, that's a lot of days you can't study and work. I moved to NY state and had a commute. Our car was the most busted falling apart jalopy ever, but we made it work. I worked part time in Manhattan for Jack and did all the research on a publication with my name on it. In school, full time again, one professor I had for two classes said I was at the top of the class and would have earned A+'s had the school offered them. Straight A's.

(Fall '08) I took off Spring semester to give birth and raise a newborn. By fall, I was enrolled again full time and also pregnant again. I earned a small scholarship to help with tuition. I was also still breast feeding and pumping and paying for my sister to come on the train (she babysat for free, but we paid for the commute). I volunteered at the local nursing home twice a week. I received one A-, my worst grade to date. Husband took a night class at the local community college for this semester and the next one to help add classes to his transcript. Another professor said my final paper was Masters Level.

(Fall '09) Again I took off Spring semester to give birth and raise a child. By the fall, enrolled full time, I had two infants under two years old. They were both born in 2008. My husband had lost his job and we were living off of unemployment. We took in a couple who needed somewhere to stay, as well as my sister. Needless to say, it didn't work out so well, but they stayed with us the whole semester, for about 4 months. We helped feed them and tried to not be selfish with our possessions. We watched their cat the whole time and some weeks after. Since my husband was not working, he went back to school to further his education and work towards a degree. He studied often in the library while I watched the kids. Usually I study intermittently or in the evenings because the day is too hectic to sit down and concentrate. I started cloth diapering. First both babies, now just one. Straight A's again.

(Spring '10) Finally back in Spring semester. Husband and I switch days of class so we don't have to pay for a sitter. We also now receive food stamps. I only have 3 classes left, including Senior Seminar which requires many papers, some weekly, and a Masters level Social Theory class with the same professor that gave me the A-! I try to read 25 pages a night to keep up. I am joining the honor society for Sociology majors and will no doubt graduate Summa Cum Laude this May. My current GPA is 3.981. I am being inducted into the sociological honor society Alpha Kappa Delta and Phi Kappa Phi.

I work five full time jobs, everyday. These include being a housekeeper, nanny, chef, early childhood educator (my students progress is amazing, by the way) and student. I mend and fix things part time, which could be included in the housekeeper category (though today many people do not do these things anymore.) I am not a C.E.O but I am an M.O.M. I also manage all the finances in the household, keeping track of bank accounts, food stamp accounts, children's accounts and paying the bills. I also budget and keep track of how much we spend on gas. I am organized and keep important papers neatly in a safe place. I return library books on time. I still manage time for play dates to keep the kids socialized and entertained. I also exhibit great leadership skills. My kids listen or else. Seriously though, they are great kids, who are sweet and caring, they share and are incredibly bright. Eat that! Speaking of eating, my culinary skills have improved immensely and I now cook a wide range of delicious vegetarian dishes from around the world.

One of my main skills in the past and now is my ability to flow with many many groups. I can be comfortable in a party in the hood, a Muslim sisters party and if I have to, a Jewish event with my 'good' face on. I enjoy diversity and learning and have been called a social chameleon more than once. I throw myself into different groups. I don't have the concept of feeling out of place, or at least I don't let fear deter me from trying. I am not fake at all, I just share in many collective consciousnesses. I have been totally accepted as a part of the Metal subculture, MSI fans, Fetish scene, and Jewish religion (see the similarities?) and partly accepted by many others. I am quite real and honest, but I am kind hearted and not malicious. I also have a great bullshit detector and am not easily manipulated. Being a busy parent and getting excellent grades has not made me any less personable. I am as spirited as any other grad without the hangover. I am responsible and keep appointments. I am versatile and unique. I am the coolest nerd you've ever met.

I also have a need to create, usually done in my free time the semesters I was off of school and the children were asleep. Some things I make are jewelry, clothing (new or deconstructed), paintings and drawings, hair accessories, wall hangings, knit scarves, crafts, and a full on tribal belly dance belt. I have even worked with wood and metal in the past. I also have a shirt design store online that is catered to activists and has witty but subtle and cleaver messages. The site is not public yet for lack of photo shop skills needed to complete execution, but the ideas are there, mine and original. The proceeds are intended to go 100% to charity. I even write in my spare time, either on my blog or on facebook about issues in the world and my personal take and input. I consider myself a Feminist and Activist.

I also like to read, bike ride, belly dance, run, stretch, mountain climb, kayak, and try any new adventurous things when time and money permits. I can put my feet on my head, do a full split and pop my hip out of place. I try to be active and I eat healthy. I also enjoy independent and foreign movies. I also got into playing free rice online to donate food to the poor while improving my vocabulary and geography skills. To be sure, it has helped me identify more countries than I ever knew before. I have been back to my home country three times. I am trying to relearn my native language. I have basic conversation skills. I can also say a few simple phrases, such as 'hello' or 'how are you' in about ten languages. I don't care much for money but I would love to travel the world. I love music and art, everything from graffiti to Rachmaninoff. I also love brain teasers and mental puzzles. I can read "Fox in Socks" without barely stumbling. I'm just that good. I can also read "Green Eggs and Ham" in Hebrew, though not surprisingly, it has a different name.

I am also green, trying to conserve as much as possible and never waste. I recycle. I have a whole list of things I do to keep green here. I have distributed free food a store was getting rid of to random people on the street, just because I felt like picking it up and doing so. I am a vegetarian and I also love animals.

Despite being 'under the poverty line', we are fairly happy. We are appreciative for everything and try to be generous in return.

I asked a friend and reference what he had to say and he came back with this: "I was about to give a simple answer about your creativity, but then I realized this was about the res for your blog, so I guess we can cast the net a little wider. Well, in addition to creativity, you have an awesome sense of humor, great taste in music, a passion for social justice, a love for minorities and the oppressed, an incisive mind and when you get on a roll on a topic that excites you - either talking or writing - there's no stopping you! You stand by your convictions, but you always listen to the other position and even more importantly, you respect the other position even if you don't agree with it. You absorb information like a sponge, you learn from all people who have something to contribute, and you're not too stubborn to adapt your position to accommodate new things you have learned. You're a loving, protective mother. You have a good work ethic. You're not materialistic. You're honest. You speak your mind while trying not to offend anyone, but collateral damage won't keep you from speaking the truth. You love peace. You're a good friend. Need more?"

My "real" resume looks pretty dull in comparison, doesn't it?!