Trying to Learn Hebrew

My newest feat (besides knitting and reading) has been trying to learn some Hebrew. I'm pretty serious about it and I think of it often, but I feel like it's so daunting. I wonder if I'll ever be able to express myself in another language as well as I do in English. . . Scratch that, as well as I want to in English. Maybe wanting to use more specific words will force me to learn more of them. I sure hope so.

On another note, I miss many of the things that we stopped doing when we moved here like composting. I want to try and pick that up again. I feel like cloth diapering is totally out, which is sad because if I had a washer and drier, I probably would have never stopped. I also hope Z potty trains soon so that diapers IN GENERAL are in the end of their phase.

Additionally, I am happy to report that Z has been better (or maybe I've been more patient). I feel like she's whining less (or again, like I'm dealing with it better). I feel like she really gets upset the most when there is something she feels she has to do and for some reason she can't. Either frustration or a parent telling her to stop what she's doing for various reasons (for example, if she wants something, but we think she's going to hurt herself the way she's going about getting it). She's been really helpful and sweet and even eating better. She still does her stubborn thing or doesn't want to listen, just like every kid, but she's pretty awesome. Lyla is definitely entering her "2's", but she's still pretty rockin' as well. I love how much they love each other. I really feel like we have such a cool little unit going on.

That reminds me. Some times people think I want, or will want, more kids. I suppose the idea could come to me, but I really don't think I'll seriously want more. Kids are cute, and I do like them, but there are so many reasons I don't want to even go there. For one, I can't afford it. I don't think it would be fair to the kids that ALREADY exist to make more that I don't, as of right now, have ANY obligation to. I have a hard enough time paying attention and caring for Z and L, and I stress SO much, more than anything, about providing for them. Making more, if I can help it, is not really part of the solution.

Secondly, they are so close in age and relationship that any new baby years later will be totally on it's own like an only child. That, and I'm really not interested in having another one so soon, even if I were financially able, and I'm SURELY not interested in having any after 30 (I'm physically destroyed enough as it is. Don't believe me? I pee myself). So there is the impossiblility of a time frame that just doesn't exist. I really love having them as my two little ones, and that they have each other. Sure, I said I wanted more before I had any, but as many new parents soon learn, you tend to change your mind about something once you actually learn what it's like!

And I suppose that's it for now.

Hood Life (Or something like it)

As most of you may know, we've moved to an area that's not quite the ghetto, it's just next door. Well there are many things I like about living here, such as sidewalks, shops we can walk to and overall friendly people. My mother in law says I get a sick thrill from walking through the hood. Oh? I think I just like to get my stuff done. But even the hollering boosts your self esteem even though you really know you look like shit and they guys are just constantly practicing with any and everyone 'to keep their game up'.

But there are some down sides, not the first of which is that Chaim's bike was very early on stolen from our back yard. (Don't worry, we hopped in the Batmobile down to the hood and found it ;D)

One thing that super sucks is that we don't have laundry access. I probably complained about this before because I knew it would mean the end of cloth diapering, which I was really upset about. (Though Chaim surely isn't...) It costs a hell of a lot more and we frequently run out of disposables. And I don't think I'll ever feel ok with throwing so many diapers out either. AND maybe Z would be potty trained too. :'(

But another two things that suck about it is the COST and the LOCATION. Granted, there are tons of laundromats around. Probably to be within walking distance of just about everyone. And they are. BUT with a double stroller I just can't make the distance. We finally dropped the $30 and bought a cart with wheels to bring our stuff around (everyone here has them-everyone!) but I can't push that and the stroller at once. I've tried to carry one baby and have the other walk, but that was before we even had the cart and even with it its still hard to have one walk and not run into crazy traffic while steering those bulky things. I've even thought of bungeeing the stroller and cart together! Now, when Chaim is around OR if I have the car, there is no problem. I just put all the kids and laundry in the car and go. Yea, its a pain to do laundry with the two little ones but there's no choice there. Or, if Chaim is home and I have the car, I can just go without them. That's the best. OR when we have car problems and therefore NO car, which seems to be the case often enough, we go with the stroller, the cart and two parents. BUT if there's no car and no husband, I can't go at all. Not unless I had a sitter and you can guess how often that's happened. When we lived upstate, we could never walk to a laundromat. As a matter of fact, I've never even been to one before moving here. But I didn't have to. We had machines in the house. They didn't always work and they were always full of our landlords stuff but at least they were there. Now if we have a barf crisis it really can become a crisis. Add that to the fact my cat is sick and peeing on EVERYONE'S bed WHILE the car is busted, and yea. Problems.

The same goes for food stores. We have a few bodegas but they sort of suck. Even the closest kosher store is one of the furthest walking-distance food stores and its not great. I can now carry some stuff in the stroller thanks to the new stroller having a basket on the bottom, but I can't get so much that I'd need the cart, because again, I can't push it while I have the kids. And stuff does get a bit beat up on the ride. :\

Another thing that sucks is that in this area you'd think there would be awesome public transportation. After all, so many people rely on it and we are the last few stops on the A train. But no, that too fails us. The stop closest to us only works going east, to the ONE LAST stop after it. Point!? So we can walk to that one or better yet, to the one further up, one stop closer to the city. But on the weekends, they are ALL closed. Yep. Not only is it the weekend schedule which takes about three hours to get anywhere, but they have to shuttle you all the way up the Rockaways to get on the subway. Now with kids, the shuttle bus becomes an ok-lets-stay-home-instead. Often, when the car worked, we just drove it to Brooklyn or Queens proper and took a train from there. Speaking of trains, they are so not stroller friendly. The city and Brooklyn are bad, but the Rockaways don't know the meaning of the word 'elevator'. I'm hoping to get a job in the city, and its good that at least I can get to the train without a ride, and the ride is probably just as long as it was from upstate, but its clearly far from seamless. At least if its for work there won't be kids with me and I can actually USE stairs. Gosh I miss those sometimes. Maybe that's why I'm getting portly.

This isn't really the fault of moving, but its really amazing how we walk or bike everywhere. You'd think I'd lose so much weight, yet I haven't lost a thing. Before I was just doing stuff at home and occasionally using the treadmill there. Here, I've walked FAR more than I ever did upstate, biked more, and even ran more the few times I've gotten to the gym (which I bike to). I still do those small workouts in my room and stretch, the only thing I don't do is breastfeed. Well apparently that's the kicker. I'm back at my pre-pregnancy weight which is normal I guess but I was hoping I could stay where I was while nursing. I remember before I was pregnant I couldn't lose an ounce either. Not while eating at least, and I like eating. :D

We totally are into biking and its a good thing that so many things are close, or at least in biking distance, including Chaim's job at night when we really don't have a car. But as with the doing-ANYTHING-without-a-husband situation, I can't bike to any of these places without someone home with the kids.

Some things like a car or washer and dryer are definitely a huge investment and upfront cost. But sometimes I think not having them is even worse. At least if you have a washer you can use it as often as needed and though the water and energy bills will go up, at least you don't have to pay the same standard price for the machine. Not having a car means you have to pay for EVERY little ride/train/subway you take to get anywhere past walking distance. Often there is no way to get to where you need to be and car services are crazy. I don't even know if you can bother with car seats in them or how costly it would be for them to wait for you so you don't have to take the seats out while at an appointment or shopping. It becomes impossible.

Two in one sidetrack combo: The car, by the way, really does go on you when you need it most. I've had such a stressful week with not having the car while I needed to get my cat to the vet for a UTI. I wanted to BIKE to him if it meant getting there. He's about 6.5 miles away (and there's a stupid toll) but without a sitter (or car) I could not do it with the kids. Side track #2, you REALLY can't do anything with kids. Wow. When people say life as you know it is over, I assumed having fun and doing things for you. But no, it means being able to LIVE and go where you truly NEED to go. I feel like having kids makes me too busy to even be able to take care of kids. For example, the laundry situation coupled with the other problems we had today makes it impossible to get the kids peed on sheets washed for them. Chaim missed class to get it taken care of but that was all we could do. We just could not have time to do laundry. Or money really. I'm really surprised and thankful and PROUD that they were fed and changed while dealing with the car-cat-crisis situation today. That's how hard it is some days. That's how much it sucks.

As a plus, there are TONS of car shops around here. I don't know why, since so many people rely on public transit (good luck) but I guess many people have cars too. I guess there's just a whole lot of many people out here.

Another thing that bothers me about the lots of many people, is that SO SO SO many of them use the "N-word". We don't say the N word. We don't even JOKE about it. And even if I was plastered drunk and going native and saying it "in a friendly way" it still won't be uttered in front of the kids. Its just not something I want them to say. Well, now that they hear it 1,034,984,352,986,429,034 times a day, we'll have to see how that turns out.

It's actually pretty sad. There were little kids at the park the other day and they kept calling each other crack heads. Not everyone here is irresponsible/on drugs/bad parents etc, but its really sad that you hear it from the mouths of babes. :(

I also feel like its so expensive to live here, or anywhere really. But to be "broke" and in an economically disadvantaged area...yea its not so great. There are obviously not a lot of jobs close by, and you have to pay for EVERYTHING like laundry, rides etc. and almost always in cash. But more than that, when you're really broke, you get the crappiest stuff. Like we've had breathing issues since moving here since its more of a basement than the last place, but the last place had it too. We keep our apartments very clean, but there's always stagnation and sometimes mold in basements so I really feel like poor people just can't get good health. Never mind health CARE, which we have (when we can get a WAY to the office....also never mind that clinics seriously take all day. You can't do ANYTHING else.) Just that poor people aren't allowed to be or STAY healthy. Now that's fucked up. Some people don't believe health care is a right. I disagree, but we *should* all agree that people shouldn't get fucked over for not having more money. There are laws against it, but yea, no one cares. Maybe if everything was taken care of, from peeling paint to affordable healthy food, there wouldn't need to be such high bills for health care in these areas. And its sad but true, soo so so so many people here have a limp. I always thought that was a stereotype...but they do. (Shootings too but that's different. Maybe related. I don't know.)

Other things include broken glass everywhere, the pain in the ass of switching information over here, finding new doctors, getting to/dealing with the medicaid/food stamp office, people's dogs etc. And maybe its a fucked up stereotype and I'm usually so against them that people call me naive, but I do also worry about people around here especially if we're talking about daycare or something like that. And I don't mean one group I mean ANYONE. Even a Jewish place. The best ones of course I can't afford, so it would have to be peoples houses. And just in general I'm so used to being with the kids that I worry about ANYONE with them, but a daycare/full time babysitter would really have to feed them and deal with them on a longer term basis. The only people I know and trust work during the day lol.

I'm sure there is more but I just felt compelled to write about that for now.

It's been a long while.

So in May we moved to Bayswater. The mosquitoes here suck. I graduated with a BA and it means nothing. But I've learned I can clean practically anything. Not out of skill but out of repetition. The kids are completely insane. I really wish I could get out of the house and have some sanity but that hasn't happened thus far. I've learned a few recipes but even cooking counts as "me time" meaning the kids don't let you do it.

Because of the move to a more 'urban' area, we don't have access to a washer and dryer anymore. I'd been using friends but just yesterday went to a laundromat for the first time ever. Zalah likes to call it the laundry-pants store. That shit is expensive. I still take darks home to line dry. Also, I'm not opposed to some light tub washing. BUT because of this, we don't cloth diaper anymore. Chaim is tickled pink, but the cost of diapers sucks. While we cloth diapered for those few months, I had a huge Costco box of diapers for Lyla and hardly made a dent. Since moving I think I've bought two at least, maybe three. I'm actually upset about it. :(

We also haven't composted, though I thought about it. We brought five of our six attempted tomato sprouts and out of five that grew short, four grew well for a while. But they were started too late and never made fruit, and just keep wilting in this terrible humid climate. :(

A bonus is that we live close to the beach and far from other bullshit, but everything has its complications. The apartment is nice, big, fairly decent but boiling hot. Except when we don't have hot water but I never shower in it anyway. I've made new friends and try to see new and old, but its tough to get it all done. I think I could manage to see people and run errands, but its the unexpected things and getting kids to get ready, eat enough, and have enough with you to handle the everyday basics and the random Oh-shit moments, like Lyla barfing in the car seat.

The kids. Ah the kids. They don't eat well, they don't sleep well, and then they try to say they want to eat when it's time for bed. 'Terrible ones' eat your hearts out. Zalah can really throw them now that she's two. Lyla can also still have her moments, but I do think much is personality and Lyla seems more calm. Zalah is very serious, even though she's sweet and likes to help, and gets frustrated easily and is very bossy. She says very funny things though, such as "Don't make me mad!", "Don't tell me no!", "I like people. We have to be nice. We can't fight.", and "Seriously!?". Lyla is talking more too, saying "gubby" for "Buggy" and little things she repeats after us. Z won't potty train, and Piotr has decided to pee all over the bath mat and outside his box. Fabulous. I gained weight that won't go away, yes, even with diet and exercise. Even with living in a sauna and chasing kids til you sweat, every single day. Must be that I can't Zumba every day... Piotr's not so slim either. Chaim just started working at a gym though, so that should help him, and it would help me if I ever had a babysitter. At least I'm not pregnant.

I'm not sure what else to say, though I bet there is more. I'm currently exhausted and have to pick Chaim up from work. The kids FINALLY went to bed after trying for a good two hours. :P At least the place is fairly clean, if not boiling hot.

Product reviews - L'Oreal and Bamboo diapers

I recently had a coupon for $1 off L'oreal Go 360° Clean from CVS, so I wanted to check it out. I never heard of it before, maybe because I live in a media-less bubble. Turns out, it is a new face wash, and WOW!

The packaging is actually more opaque than this, with the green and orange being more clear of a gel. The orange has little beads in it for exfoliating. I wasn't sure which one to try but I went with the sensitive, probably because I usually use a sensitive Oil of Olay foaming wash, even though I have no idea what kind of skin I really have. (Dry, combo, sensitive??)

It has this little scrubber that, as you can see, comes out of the bottle. I'm not usually impressed by gimmicks like this, so I was objective about trying it. It is super soft like a silicone with little raised nubs. I also noticed the back end is a suction. I don't know if its on purpose, but I keep it on my mirror instead of putting it back in the bottle for easier access.
What I don't like, is that neither it or the bottle are recyclable. Uh oh! But I will give away any if I buy another bottle. Sometimes I think these things should be separate.

All face washes promise less break outs and smoother skin, etc, but I usually feel generally apathetic about them all. Mainly I just look for one that actually REMOVES my makeup from my back-in-the-day-ton-of-makeup days without raccooning a greasy mess around my eyes. Well I am very impressed with the 360° clean. It not only removes my makeup, with help from the scrubber, but actually cleans. I had compliments on my frightening bare-naked skin within a day or two of using it, even with a few residual blemishes that were from a few days earlier. Since then, new ones have not appeared. I think the combination of great face wash and that neat little do-dad really does the trick. It also exfoliates but gently, so I can still use my apricot scrub every few days, but have brighter skin just from my nightly washing. I also liked that I chose the sensitive, since I've read a few reviews that said the normal ones were a bit drying. Even Chaim likes it, and we do notice smaller pores!

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Onto their new collagen volume mascara. I bought this a little while ago, since I'm always trying new mascaras, and often they are L'Oreal. When I finally opened it, it was sort of dry and clumpy. Of course, as with the face wash, they always promise no clumps and tons of volume. I wasn't so impressed. I returned it to CVS the same time I bought the Go 360° Clean and got a replacement. It was a little less dry than a normal new mascara, but a bit better than the old one. Sometimes, new mascara is TOO wet and it gets all over. It still clumped a little, and still felt dry on my lashes and pulled, which wasn't too nice. I always get waterproof, for some reason, so its usually tough to get off. This one is no exception. Overall I'm not too impressed with this one, which is sad because I loved Lash Architect, Voluminous, Volume Shocking, Panoramic Curl and even Telescopic was ok, though I usually like volume (can you tell?) over long and thin. I'll have to go back to a tried and true next time, or just return this one now.

On the plus side, L'Oreals website is gorgeous and wonderful for info such as creating a custom skin regiment. And on websites, so is Chiquita's! I was impressed.

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On to another item since we're on topic of reviews, Bagshot Row Bamboo diapers suck. Don't even waste your $20. I don't even fully get it. It's like an all in one diaper, since its contoured and elastic at the legs, but its not. It doesn't close on its own, so you need a pin or snappi and it doesn't have a cover, so I played it safe and put a Thirsties on it. What's the point of a cute diaper if it needs a cover? It certainly didn't look waterproof...and on that topic, what's the point of paying $20 when you still need all the other stuff!? It also has a 'snap in' doubler that is like 2 long thin sheets, and a small pad that was like a liner but the same material. What I HATE is how it goes on the outside, verses how a FuzziBunz holds the bulk of material inside a pocket. This, geniuses, is to keep it mess free, and cleaning a massive poop off of 4 different surfaces WAS NOT! It didn't even wash out well. Prefolds stain sometimes, but its not so bad and FB washes pretty cleanly because of the material they use. Overall, prefold are way cheaper, better and even *gasp!* easier to clean if you fold them right, even WITHOUT a liner. The ease-level is about the same as well. Why would any sane person pay so much?? Oh right, its "in style". F that noise.

I'm so annoyed I don't even want to take my own picture.

How I Diaper

First, I fold the diaper in three, into the middle which is the thickest. This is standard.


But what I do differently is flip it over. Then I simply lay a liner directly over the whole length, put one side under her tush, and pull the front up and between her legs.


I folded the front down because this is an extra long diaper. With some brands you won't have to do this. Then I pull the back flaps out from under her and tuck the front flaps under them and secure with a snappi. I use the bottom part of the snappi to hook the middle pieces and keep them folded together.


Cover with a diaper cover. I like Thristies 2.0.


I think the fold I use is just a standard fold, but inside out. I found the other way, which maybe was meant to hold the poop, just got it all over the sides as well as middle. This way it stays on the middle and since I use liners now, there is no need for a fancy fold to hold the doody. I've tried newspaper folds before and liked how it utilized that extra thickness on top. What are your favorite folds?

The Liners (and Covers) that Saved me!

I've posted about cloth diapers a few times before. The first impression and a followup. Well its time for another. My awesome friend Amanda bought me the first things I needed to start as well as told me about the site she gets her stuff from, Mom's Milk Boutique. I have ordered from them before to add some more diapers to my collection. I went with those unbleached Indian prefolds that were seen in the previous diaper post. (These are great because they are actually very soft, super absorbent and extra long.) I decided it was time for a second trip to Mom's Milk, for the much awaited covers I needed and while there, I also decided to pick up some liners. After reading reviews, I went with the ImseVimse in toddler size.

(Not my pic)

I have to say, these are a LIFE SAVER!!! The few times I've used them, she's only peed in them ONCE! So I guess that's a lot of poop! But I have skipped a few times in the hopes that she just pooped and wouldn't again. It worked a few times, but I've had to clean the diaper "regularly" one time. I have also previously switched (sucked it up) to cleaning the diaper off in the actual toilet. It's not as gross as you might think (and probably better than using the sink) but its coooolllldd! These liners make that whole ordeal basically unnecessary! Also, having more covers is great and I have to do the laundry so much less! This matters since our washer situation is still a mess. I also let them air out over our shower rack if they are pee-smelling and use another one. By the next day the smell is gone and I can alternate more often. This also works if there is a little poop on the plastic part, but not on the fabric part. That can rinse right off and air dry as well, and if I do a load, I throw all the used ones in anyway!

I have only used the liners a few times because I tend to not use cloth diapers on weekends, mainly because I am away and its daunting for me. But that brings up another issue; I personally use a washcloth or rag on Shabbas for the kids faces, but you are not supposed to 'squeeze'. If someone was religious enough to not squeeze out on Shabbas (or back in the old days) what would they do!? Shake it off (doesn't really work, fyi) and put it in a bucket with poop on it? Wet or Dry? Wet doesn't really get the stain out, unless you rub the material together, and that is not allowed, and dry, well that's just gross and smelly. Feel free to let me know what you think!

My only caution is that us cloth diaperers might be used to using the diaper to wipe some of the poop off. So naturally, my instinct was to use the liner for this. DON'T! They are thinner than paper, and you WILL get pooty hands. :( They still leave a stain on the diaper when you remove them, a little thicker than my picture of them rinsed out. But some moms and dads might be ok with putting it in a wet bag or bucket from there. I still rinse mine out a bit, spray them and hang them on the bucket to dry a little like before. Its just a whole lot easier! I highly recommend it for "big kid poops", and even want to do it for Zalah to get her to POTTY TRAIN ALREADY! But, alas, she lost my small snappi so now I only have the one. :P Guess I have to go back to Mom's Milk Boutique!

Cloth Diapering Revisited

I am a multi-tasker. Sometimes this works out, sometimes I end up in the middle of twenty things that are unfinished. (Usually this is because some "child-crisis" happens. On my own, I can finish things up pretty nicely.) The reason this relates is because I recently tried cloth diapering, and being me, I felt guilty not going in 110% and diapering BOTH kids at the same time. This is for green reasons as well as practicality; the "It's here, why not" idea. As you can see, that didn't work out so well because its going from 0-2(massive-poops-in-cloth-simultaneously) not to mention my inexperience with it since I started late in the game, while they were older. Since then, I've only been cloth diapering Lyla, the one year old. While she isn't a newborn anymore and has solid bowel movements, it was definitely a lot easier. Firstly, one year old poops compared to two year old poops are very VERY, did I say VERY different!? Starting out at least from here is a lot easier than just going straight to the danger zone. And at least hers come off better than Zalah's. I worry a little that she isn't drinking enough, but maybe Zalah is just eating too many prunes!

Now, I'll be hoping to keep cloth diapering her until she is also older, age two if that is necessary. But that brings the second point; its just one of them. I guess I didn't want to think "one more" would complicate things further, but if you think about it, its double duty. Double doody. It's not the most fun job around, but it is a whole lot easier.

I do wish that Zalah had the benefit of potty training earlier, but since I started (and finished) cloth diapering her so late, she would have none of it. She HATED being in them, and I don't blame her. Even Lyla hates it, but I can force her a little easier for now. I sort of wish I had started earlier for this reason, but my original hesitancy was access to the washer and dryer, and lo and behold, they are broken. Having half as many diapers, however, has made that situation bearable since I just take them to a friends house and have to do that less often then before. Maybe Lyla will potty train earlier (I was aiming for 2 years old in general) because of the cloth diapers and big sister influence.

There are some things that I now appreciate since the whole thing has become a bit easier for me. The cloth diapers REALLY DON'T LEAK. That is incredible. I feel like younger babies leak more in general, but one would think cloth would leak as well. Nope, that part has been problem free. Rather they absorb all over, so its wet right under her belly button and all through the front, but not outside. (I can see why they hate that feeling though!) And these babies REALLY do absorb!! Some days I change her 3-4 times like I did in disposables. Nice.

There also really is NO rash. It seems impossible, but her tush is nice and clean and peachy. :) I sometimes even forget to wipe her after a pee pee! When I cloth diapered both, I had to wash the diapers so frequently, that they ended up in disposables half of the time anyway. Since I've switched to Lyla exclusively, she's only been in disposables while I wash them, and that's now less often. I still only have two covers, so I just wash them both when I do a load, hence the need for disposables at all. I never have gone through all of my diapers in one load. I have 18 in all, and my usual load is about 12 or so. Maybe I should invest in a few more covers!

That brings the next issue: the covers. Previously I mentioned how they smell a lot. They still do, sort of, but I've let it go and reuse them, sometimes all day. I think actually washing them in a machine that WORKED helped get rid of the smell. Sometimes I also air them out overnight while she's in another one and that also takes off some of the pungency. *Speaking of pungent and diapers....they both need some right now!*

That brings me to how I clean them. This is sort of gross, but if they are just pee or a poop that comes off easily, I rinse them in the sink. Then I do the rest of the steps. Today, however, Lyla had a sticky poo. First, I scraped it off with my knife. *still gross, and no picture for that one...*

Then I emptied my bucket of dirty diapers, and rub off the excess with water in there.

This is the second or third wave, so the water isn't so murky anymore. I dumpy my 'brown water' in the toilet and usually that flushes the whole thing.

Next I wring it out and spray it with Bac-Out.

This is how much of a stain is left when I'm done with my pre-treat phase.

Then I hang it over the bucket edge to dry for a while, or until I need the space for a new one.

This way, the diapers aren't to stinky or covered in poo so I can afford to wait a teeny bit to wash them, and worry less about staining. I also bought a new cat litter that came in a tub, so I'm planning on using that as a second bucket so I stop getting my nice one all poo-filled.

I do feel pretty gross after this still, but Zalah's were FAR worse. Lyla is also in her wiggly stage (which is a pretty long lasting stage) so dressing her or changing her is always a challenge, but I guess that would be for disposables as well.

So thankfully, Cloth Diapering is looking up! Though I still think FuzziBunz are the best!

Cloth Diapering Hell

So I started cloth diapering part time in the beginning of the month. I really want to like it, I do. But I HATE it!! :( This morning is a great example of WHY. Last night, I thought I should put them both in cloth diapers. I want to use them as much as possible, and I find that I'm actually either away from the house a lot or the covers are not clean, so they end up in disposables. So I went with it. I had done it before, but this weekend we were WAY too exhausted. I woke up to screams at about 7:30, which to us is far too early than what we'd like. Zalah has been in our room so that Lyla can learn to sleep through the night. But Zalah has been waking up around 3am and not going back to bed with us, even when we try. Last night she did just that, after we went to bed at 2am! I wouldn't even mind getting up at 7, which I have to do for days I have class anyway, but I try to get to bed at 12 or so. Also, its harder when I'm awake at night, and I think so far they've both slept through the night together only once or twice. :P So at 7:30, it was Lyla's screams that woke me. She had a 'light' poop stuck onto the diaper so while half asleep I changed her. I went to try to clean it off with a plastic knife that I keep for the purpose and then rub it off under running water in either the sink or bucket. I also used to clean the toilet and sink with cleaner after each time because of the fact that it gets where people, especially the kids, can touch. I can't do that anymore. I then added it to my pail with ample baking soda (I think I went through a box in a week or so...it doesn't really help). Zalah was up soon after, full of pee. Chaim has been complaining it reeks like a urinal, and he's not really wrong. So now I rinse those, over and over, as the water turns a little less yellow. My hands reek from doing this. My hands are in water so much of the time anyway, which of course hurts in the New York winter air. I constantly get sprayed with water that is full of excrement. The poop smell never seems to leave me. This morning could have been even worse with double poop duty. Before I used to fold the diapers in a way that the poop got on all the edges and scraping it was a battle. Now its a little better, but I'm always dumping the water with poop bits in it, to get them clean enough to sit in a bucket for a few days before I can get to the laundry. And since I don't use that many, I don't want to do a load that's barely full. This morning was so bad for us, we forced them to go to bed early and we slept on and off until one. :\ After having little sleep all weekend, and basically we don't get much to begin with, we really couldn't take it.

Here comes the second problem: The covers. If they go to the bathroom in them, pee or poop, even without leaks, they REEK! I tried to hand wash them and air dry them, with detergent and baking soda, and they STILL smell. I don't even think they are so fresh after the washer has a go at them. Because I only have two covers, they don't last so long without smelling so once that happens and I wash them, I have to use the disposables again. And there are times I've tried to hand wash all of it, only to put it in the washer anyway because it just doesn't come clean. Today I finally did my load of maybe 12 of them, the covers, the one FuzziBunz I have and some socks for filler. I did it TWICE and still found poop bits afterwards. The second time I used bleach, because I really needed it. The stains have never come out before. After the bleach load, they looked cleaner, except for the one Lyla made this AM. Better than nothing. The covers still smell a little, but its not so bad. (I didn't bleach those.) The kids also HATE being put into the cloth diapers. I asked Zalah if it hurts her and she says no, so maybe it is just the folding and pulling or maybe its how they feel different to them. I don't know. Lyla is in the age where she can NOT sit still for any diaper, which is super annoying.

Despite all this, I keep trying, though every time I hit a "poop" bump in the road it becomes so overwhelming. (They both just pooped, and I'm so GLAD they're in disposables!!) I know it might help if I had more access to a washer, or a sprayer or liners or more covers or all of those things. But that all costs money and I'm not sure if its worth the investment so far into it. Also, I wanted to do this when Zalah was first born, and maybe it would have been easier to start when she had those little mustard squirts for poops. Now I have two "big girls" who have BIG poops, and lately none are the kind that come off easily. This is gross, but they are sticky, tarry and wet. It is a constant battle.

I have to say, the FuzziBunz is THE BEST. I wish I could have a whole supply of them, even from day one. They are SO easy, I haven't had a leak (with the prefolds either really, which is great!). Fuzzibunz are smaller and I think that keeps them easier to clean. It seems like the material is also easier to rub the poop out of. Also they seem to be easier to put on, the bulkiness factor is less and they feel nicer.

I still think cloth diapering is great for the money factor, but all the time I spend cleaning them and how gross I feel afterward really subtracts from that. The kids have less of a rash in them, which is important, but they hate how they feel. They are better for the environment and don't really leak, so in a way they are functional, but depending on the type they can be quite difficult. I wish it was easier!!!! Someone send me a doody nanny!!!

The MOM Workout

I said a ways back that I wanted to post about my workout routine post-baby. While I did a decent amount of running and sit ups and the like, that time has loooong since gone! I would love to exercise more often, since I think it feels great and is good for you, mind and body, but I can't really find the time. However, people always ask me how I stay "in shape". Although I think I could always improve by, Oh I don't know, ACTUALLY working out, I guess some things help out even when you don't have a lot of time. So below I will outline "The MOM Workout" which is great to fit into any busy mom schedule, and things you probably do already! As with most things I write, its meant to be mostly humorous! :)

1. Awaken to the sound of screaming, rush to change and feed the kids and do all that good morning stuff. This is great for a speed drill, especially if you have somewhere to be, as well as a 'Warm Up'.

2. A great way to start is by stretching out in the morning. One of my favorites is to reach over the child gate to get the cat's water and food to refill. I usually stand on one leg so I can reach farther, so this is also good for balance. If you want to step it up a notch, do it while holding a baby. Be careful though, because without balance you will fall!



3. Kids want to play the instant they wake up. Here are some of my favorite moves for you and them:



Place child on lower legs and either lift up and down at the knee, to create a burn in the thigh (demonstrated above) or extend your knees out and then in (see picture below). With the knee extend, you can exhale in their face because they think its funny. And this version is great for the abs! Small babies tend to not hang on and roll off, so you might want to secure them with a belt.



4. Then when it comes time to dressing everyone, changing babies can be a great workout! Not only do they fuss like crazy which breaks a sweat, but while changing #2 or yourself, inevitably #1 will get into things like sharp objects, toilet water, or just general mess making. This tests your reflexes. While trying to avert this situation half dressed, people might walk in and further your reflex skills.

-No picture necessary here-

5. About one PM, try to squeeze in some light breakfast like the toast you forgot in the toaster five hours ago, or a much awaited glass of water. If the kids are awake, try to fit this in between the folding-laundry-while-brushing-your-teeth routine and the have-to-jet-off-the-pot-while-your-pants-are-still-down-to-avoid-child-inflicting-injury-on-themselves acrobatics. This is great for the too-busy-to-eat-diet. Though I must warn you, midnight chocolate cravings will occur frequently!! See step number two to remedy this problem the next morning.

6. Poop is a great workout. Cleaning cloth diapers takes a lot of muscle strength and balance (see below). Other than "the self agitator" in a bucket for overall arm toning, this is one of my favorite moves I created while drying a diaper cover with a towel; The Diaper Lotus:



Patience grasshopper! This one is for more advanced poop touchers.

Laundry can help your arm and shoulder muscles, especially if you have to be a renegade and steal the system after piles of laundry add up and you can take it no longer. One of my favorites is The Lift and Haul, the heavier the better!



7. Another frequent exercise that you might find yourself doing is the Lunge and Lift. This happens periodically throughout the day when you have to grab the children out of the way of the vacuum or from previously mentioned perils they find themselves in. It works by sprinting and stopping short reminiscent of High School basketball drills, and then lunging forward and lifting the child. The reason it works so well is because of the repetition. They never want to be put down, so in your haste you will find yourself doing it quite often.

8. At about 6 PM it might feel like midnight, but the fun is only beginning! Now its time for the Mad Dash Relay: The kids are grumpy, need changes complete with diaper cleaning while cooking dinner and making a salad (don't forget the dishes! :D). The older one takes the lead and dives on the cat! The little one gets stepped on from behind! The garbage is full, you're out of garlic and the salt needs to be refilled. Your hair falls in your face but your hands are covered in sauce that is stinging them and your contacts are dry from the steam. GO!

9. Right as the relay ends and your husband comes home and tells you he already ate and is leaving again to escape the madness, you notice your child is rubbing snot all over her face and could use a bath. Time for Double Bath Duty complete with lotion, ear cleanings and nail clippings! (All 40 of them! Great for efficiency.) This is also a good time to practice your greased hog catching as the ones who can run tend to jump out of the tub while covered in suds and do so.

10. Now its time for quiet (aka more cleaning) that I like to call 'Cool Down'. You can try to read a leisurely book or study for classes. (HA!) Don't forget to make lunches for the next day, finish the dishes and deal with stragglers. Try to remember to shower once a week and soon you'll be lookin' hot!

Insanity!?

So because I recently decided to become more insane, I've decided to cloth diaper, at least part-time. I'll keep you posted on how it goes, or maybe I won't, since the kids don't even let me go to the bathroom without screaming bloody murder and bothering me. :D